Reflecting on Model Citizen: The Book I Didn’t Publish

I wrote a book I never published and probably never will.

At the time, I considered it a failure.  But that book wasn’t meant to make me famous.

It wasn’t meant to launch me into the stratosphere with Mark Twain and Ernest Hemingway.

It was meant to be therapy.

It changed my mind.  It changed my heart.  It changed everything about me.

It changed what I do and why I do it.

It broke illusions and helped me overcome false limiting beliefs.

It made me recognize blind spots I didn’t know I had.

I became a better son, brother, friend, and person.

I became a better writer.

Writing that book was invaluable.  It’s one of the things that made me the person I am today.

Even if the book wasn’t good, it was from the heart.

Because it was from the heart, it exposed me to myself – the good and the bad.

It was a mirror.

When you look in the mirror and your hair is messed up, you fix it.

When you look in the mirror and your attitude is messed up, you fix it.

Your relationships improve.

You become happier and more successful.

Because you discovered deep truths about yourself that you were blind to before.

There’s a weight off your shoulders and your spirit is uplifted.

By changing your mind and changing your heart and eliminating false beliefs that were holding you back.

From love.

From joy.

From gratitude.

From freedom.

Writing that book was a life changing experience, even if it never sells a single copy.

I wrote that book for me, and it did it’s job.

It’s job was to make me grow.

Writing a book I didn’t publish was one of the best things I’ve ever done in my life.

I’ve grown mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually, professionally, and in my relationships.

Writing is incredibly powerful when you use it as a means of self-discovery.

By recording your thoughts every day for long periods of time, you start to recognize patterns.

When you are writing from the heart, those patterns are your core beliefs.

And what you realize is that some of them are not true.

And that is a life changing experience.

Realizing that some of your most closely held beliefs are not only false, but holding you back from everything you want in life.

It opens you up to a whole new world of possibilities when you can see your blind spots and expose yourself to your own false beliefs.

About money.

About success.

About relationships.

About work.

Like being cleared from a fog, the whole world opens up and you see the beauty and possibility everywhere.

With an open heart.

And an open mind.

The book is called Model Citizen.

I haven’t read it in years and can hardly remember what’s in there.

Maybe one day I will read it again just to see.

Visit my essays page.
Visit my YouTube channel for surfing, skating, and music videos.