I got a haircut today, which is remarkable only because I decided to pay for it. I thought about busting out the clippers and doing it myself or calling up one of the homies and taking my chances. But I didn’t do that. I went to the barber instead. He cleaned me up for $10, and I tipped him $5, as always. The haircut came out great. It was $15 well spent, especially since I’m looking for a second job. I can’t be showing up to interviews looking like a goof with messed-up hair. I’m glad I left that job to a pro.

Law is another job that should be left to the pros. Everybody thinks they know the law until they have an actual legal issue. Then, if they’re smart, they realize the waters are deep, and the consequences are great, and they hire a lawyer – if they can afford one. That’s the problem: a lot of people can’t afford lawyers. I tried to solve this problem once by creating an online marketplace where people could purchase a-la-carte legal services from live attorneys who worked independently and remotely. The idea was that if we could cut out big law firms’ overhead, we could provide quality legal services to people at more affordable rates. The business failed, I went bankrupt, and most people still can’t afford a good lawyer – so I guess it wasn’t meant to be.

Shooting machine guns is another job that should be left to the pros. I’m not talking about your hunting rifle or the six-shooter you keep in your dresser to protect your home in the worst-case scenario. Those aren’t the problem. I’m talking about assault rifles – death machines – machines specifically designed to kill as many people as quickly as possible. That kind of artillery is only necessary in a live war zone. There is no circumstance where Joe Shmoe should carry a weapon like that. None.

Just like practicing law and giving haircuts, shooting machine guns is a job better left to the pros.