The Hero’s Mindset

Why no one cares about your stories, and how to fix it.

‘’Nobody cares about your story until you’re successful.’’

I read that quote yesterday from someone whose opinion I respect, and it punched me right in the face.

It struck a nerve with me.

I had to unpackage it, so I started writing about it.  And I just kept going.

Was he saying that you don’t have a right to tell your story until you’re successful?

That can’t possibly be true.

And who says whether you’re successful or not?

Everyone has a story, and they all deserve to be told.

Your personal story is the most powerful thing you have.

How could you ever take that away from someone?

It doesn’t seem right.

But I couldn’t deny that what he said was true.

I have written and shared a lot of my stories and, most of the time, no one cares.

It’s not because I’m boring.  Because I’m not.

And it isn’t because I’m no good at telling stories.  I am a good storyteller.

No one cared about my stories because I wasn’t successful.

That doesn’t mean that I wasn’t successful in my life.

It means I wasn’t successful in the story.

People only care about heroes, not about victims.

If nobody cares about your story, it means you’re the victim and not the hero.

You told the story from the wrong perspective.

You always have to tell the story from the perspective of the hero, not of the victim.

That doesn’t mean that bad things never happen to the hero – of course they do.

Trials and tribulations are an essential part of the hero’s journey.

With no trials and tribulations, there is no hero.

But the trials and tribulations are not what define the hero – it’s how he reacts to them.

Everyone gets knocked down in life.  It’s part of the deal.

But people want to hear about how you got up.

Nobody wants to hear about how you got knocked down and couldn’t get back up.  It makes them sad.

People don’t want to be sad.  They already have reasons for that.

People want reasons to be inspired.

They want to know HOW you got back up and WHY.

Why did the hero keep fighting when all the cards were stacked against him?

How did he keep going when everything was going wrong?

What tiny bit of leverage did he find to get just enough of a foothold to keep going?

That’s what people want to hear about.

It doesn’t matter if you’ve reached your goal yet.

There will always be some goal that is just out of reach.

And once you reach that one, there will be another one.

The goal doesn’t matter.

The fight is what matters.

The fight is where the gold is.

If you don’t have success stories, then tell fight stories.

If you’re in a fight right now, then talk about what you’re doing to win.

It doesn’t matter that you haven’t won yet.

What matters is how you fight.

Are you fighting like a hero, or a victim?

Do you have a hero’s mentality, or a victim’s?

The mindset is what has value.

You have to adopt a hero’s mindset and tell the story from that perspective.

People only care about the hero.  Not the victim.

Nobody would care about David if he lost to Goliath.

People cared about him because he was a hero.

You have to be the hero of your own story if you want people to care about it.

It’s okay to sweat.  It’s okay to bleed.  It’s okay to cry.

It’s not okay to be the victim.

It’s not okay to submit.

It’s not okay to give up.

You have to fight until the end, and then find reasons to keep fighting.

That’s what people want to hear about.

You don’t have to fake it, and you shouldn’t.

But you have to adopt a hero’s mindset, even if you don’t feel like a hero yet.

When you adopt a hero’s mindset, funny things happen.

You start to think like a hero.

You start to feel like a hero.

You start to act like a hero.

And when you start to act like a hero, that’s when the magic happens.

That’s when people start to care.

If nobody cares about your stories, then take the mindset of a hero.

Start telling your stories from that perspective.

That doesn’t mean be fake.

It doesn’t mean gloss over harsh truths or complicated realities.

To the contrary, lean into hardships.

Tell them in all their bloody details.

But make sure that you are always the hero striving valiantly.

And never the victim falling prey to circumstance.

If you feel like you’re losing, you’re not.

It just means that the fight isn’t over yet.

God did not put you hear to fail.

If you are going through it right now, keep going.

The darkest moments often come before the biggest breakthroughs.

We were all born to live our dreams.

The power of your story is in what you did to live yours.

That’s what people care about.

That’s why people read your stories.

If you feel like you’re defeated, you’re not.

It just means there’s something you haven’t done yet.

If you need help, then ask for it.

Heroes form alliances.

On the good days, build.

On the bad days, build.

When it all falls apart, rebuild.

Heroes accept responsibility.  They don’t blame others.

Heroes focus on opportunities.  They don’t give in to cynicism.

Heroes see obstacles as part of the process, not roadblocks.

If nobody cares about your stories, then start telling them from the perspective of the hero.

And watch how people start to care.

More essays by Eddie.
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