A Big Career Pivot

Why I am leaving the legal industry after 20 years to pursue a different career.

My Legal Career

I passed the California Bar Exam in 2009 – so if you want to count that as the beginning of my legal career, I have been in the game for over 15 years.

In reality, my legal career started well before that.  If we include law school, studying for the LSAT, and my time as an undergraduate law clerk, my legal career goes back over 20 years.

Twenty years is enough time to know whether you like something or not.

I did not like law school.

I did not like being a lawyer.

I did not like being a law firm marketer.

I did not like the legal industry, period.

With that being the case, the real question isn’t why I left the legal industry, but why I stuck around so long.

If you look at how much time I spent doing things I don’t like, you might think that my life has been a tragedy.  But it has not – and the reason is that I spent all my time outside of work doing things I do like.

Now, my goal is to spend all my time doing things I like – including my time at work.  This may sound bold and ambitious to some people – maybe even arrogant.  Many people spend their lives suffering in silence in jobs they secretly loathe.  I know that role well, because I did it for 20+ years.

But I’m not going to do it anymore.

The change is happening now.

But Why Now?

Why, after staying stuck for so long, did I finally decide to change and do what I want to do with my life?

Desperation, really.  My life in an unhappy career fell apart.

I couldn’t find the clients I needed to keep going.  My attitude became miserable.  My family could no longer support me.  My wife could no longer stand me.  I could no longer stand myself.

I changed because I had to.  I simply could not keep going the way I was going.  I couldn’t keep the act up anymore.  It was ruining my life.

I had to find work that truly aligned with what I wanted to be doing.

So, I made a pivot.  I committed to the career that I really want.  I have not made a dime off it yet, and I’m not sure I ever will.  But I am already 100% happier – and I am 100% committed to my new job, with every fiber of my being, which is why I believe it’s going to work.

The Road Ahead

I want to be an author and musician, so that is the job I am creating.  I don’t care if I’m not good enough, yet.  I don’t care that I don’t feel ready.  I don’t care what anyone else thinks about it.

I am doing what I have to do to survive – to be myself – to have some semblance of happiness in my life.

If I die on this hill, then I die on this hill.  So be it.  I am ready.  I would rather go down in a ball of flames doing what I love, than die the slow death of showing up every day for work that doesn’t excite me.

I know people who have made a lot of money doing jobs they don’t like.  They might consider me a fool or a selfish idiot.  They might say things like, ‘’Who do you think you are to do what you want all the time?’’  – this is the mentality of a slave.

The real question is, ‘’Who am I not to do what I want all the time?’’

‘’The ability to do what you want, when you want, with whom you want, for as long as you want.’’  Is that not the definition of success?  If that is not success, then what is?

Money is important.  Don’t get me wrong.  I’ve been broke and bankrupt before.  I know what it’s like to have anxiety attacks every time I go to the ATM, and call my mom in tears because I am not going to make rent.

Being broke is horrible, and it’s incredibly stressful – which is why I don’t plan on being broke.  Not again.

The biggest lie I told myself was that there was financial security in the legal industry, when in reality there was not.  There is just as much security in the career I want as in the one I didn’t want.

So, I am moving in a new direction – one that is much more aligned with my real dreams and desires.

I have no malice or spite towards the legal industry or the people in it.  To the contrary, I have a lot of respect for the lawyers who show up every day and fight for justice.  It takes a lot to keep that up.

I’ve met a lot of honest, kind, completely decent people in the legal industry – people who bend over backwards to help others – so this move should not be seen as an indictment of them.

It also should not be seen as a step backward or an admission of defeat.  To the contrary, this is a giant leap forward towards victory – towards claiming what is mine and living the life I want to live.

I don’t have any advice or wisdom to share.  I am not arrogant enough to tell people how they should live their lives.  But I do know that the farther I get away from the legal industry, and the closer I get to the things I love, the more excited I am about work – and the more excited I am about work, the better I do at it.

Surely, I will face challenges on this road.  My next blog might be about how I am getting my ass kicked in my new profession, how I am not good enough yet, and how I will soon be packing boxes for Amazon to make ends meet.  I certainly hope that’s not the case, but I can’t rule it out.

Whether I win or lose, I am going to keep writing about it and sharing my experiences online because that is what I do.  That’s the path I’ve chosen.

Helping Other People

My job is to become the writer and artist I have always wanted to be, and share my experiences so that maybe – just maybe – I can help others on their journey…even if only in a small way.

If being the best I can be helps make someone else 1% better, then I am winning at life.  So, that’s what I am going to do.

You have to uplift yourself before you can uplift others.  If you put on your life jacket first, then you are in a much better position to help your brother with his.

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